Dear (6 month) Emmett,
Last night God gave me such a special moment of reflection as I stood over you. Just this last week you have really started sleeping really well ALL night, and I’m not going to lie–I am thankful. You did a few months ago, but life threw you for a loop when your teeth started coming in and rocked the boat in the slightest way. But, last night I just came in to check on you after hearing a tiny, sleepy, cry…and watched you find your pacifier, put it back in your mouth, and immediately roll over and go back to sleep. ALL BY YOURSELF.
And then I cried.
I cried because for the first time, I really watched you take care of yourself…and I wasn’t needed to make it better. It’s so true when mom veterans say you’ll miss all the things that made you so tired. Every sleepless night in retrospect is such an incredible blessing. I had the incredible advantage of having older friends who reminded me of this before and never took a single moment cuddling or night feeding for granted.
As I stood there watching you sleep so peacefully, it was almost as if you were cradled in the love of our Father in the most physical way, the way that we crave to feel him spiritually in adulthood. And my heart was so full of that love.
Every day we were together before you were born I prayed for you to already be being filled with the Spirit. I prayed for you to pursue Christ. I prayed for you to be healthy. I prayed for you to be happy. And my sweet E, you are by far the happiest baby I’ve ever met! Your happiness brings such joy to others, a joy that can only come from God. I am SO thankful. Every night your amazing daddy and I pray the exact same things over you that we did back then.
You’re learning something new everyday now it seems! Oh my sweet baby boy, trying to stand and crawl and walk-sometimes all at once! 😉 It is so inspiring to see you’re enthusiasm for life as you explore your new territory. You get frustrated when you think you can already do those things and it always makes me smile because it reminds me of my impatience and your dad’s determination.
I watched you sleep for what felt like forever before I shut the door. I then returned back to our bedroom and crying I told your dad not to laugh at me because I was having an emotional mom moment. Of course he did. But then agreed when I told him why.
After waiting for what felt like an eternity I can’t even believe that you have already been here, in my arms 6 months! Your dad and I have cherished EVERY moment. I love how you watch him, and get the BIGGEST smile on your face when he walks in the room. I know we tell you we love you everyday, but I pray you always know how thankful we are for you. You are such a blessing to us. We have learned so much about the love of God from you and hope as you grow you see His love reflected in us.
Love you more than ever,